Drench Yourself in Words Unspoken

Today, at work, I came out of the closet.
No, I am not a lesbian, though there is nothing wrong with that. I mean I came out in the sense that I told someone that I was a writer. I feel like I have a lot of nerve calling myself that right now, as all I have written since Uni is some very corny and badly written blogs. But it was oddly nice to show someone that there is in fact a lot more to me than the shy girl who sits behind the pillar, keeps her head down, and works her butt off.
It made me realise that it was about time that I cashed in on my (debatable) talents. Perhaps I made it a hobby? Instead of saying 'I'm doing nothing this weekend' I say 'the usual, writing, gym'ing, you know.' (all pretentiously...)

I also had a freak out today. I was having a look at one bedroom flats in certain cities in England, and the main question I was asking myself when looking at them was "should things get lonely, could I stay there alone?". I freaked out, how would I cope living alone in a new place with no close friends? Until I realised, it wouldn't be much different to life right now. Out of my large group of close friends there are a small handful left in Aberdeen, most of whom I rarely have the privilege of time to see anymore. Why should it be so terrifying to move away? If they're real friends I know I'll see them whenever possible and it'll go back to the way it was. I'm still on the fence of leaving, but I know that if certain things (read: people) hadn't happened last Spring I would have left in May. I have never wanted to stay in Aberdeen, not since I was 17 and choosing universities, and whilst I am so very very glad that I did in the end, I can't help but think it's time to jump.
I am still very young, and at risk of making an immature and misinformed decision, choosing passion over sense, so I would like to hear from you. Especially if you've moved away from what you know to a brand new place, knowing no one, what have been/were your experiences, how did you cope, was it hard, did it get worse or better? I'd really like to know. Answers on a postcard please. Or if you're not into snail mail pop it in the comments thingy, a facebook message, or even an email (shkat_1989@hotmail.com). Most of all I want to know what you think, the whole truth, and nothing but the truth (please).

And with that I am going to stop procrastinating from doing other lifey type things and say peace out my beautiful people.

I got a new gadget!
I am sitting in Starbucks sipping coffee and eating a yumini (a yummy panini kids, keep up) typing on my very stylish and pretentious netbook, which is sadly about 20 times faster than my £400 'state of the art 2 years ago' laptop that might as well be running Windows 95 for all the good it does me.
Before I did this myself, I always hated the people who sat in coffee shops drinking over priced stimulants whilst blogging, or facebooking, or even tumbling (something which many of us will know ought not to be done in public). But here I am, consuming food and drink that cost me over £6 (SIX POUNDS?!) to purchase and typing furiously on this little cutie. But you know what? I kinda get it now. I came here as we don't have internet in the Flat on Haunted Hill and I felt the overwhelming need to make a new life plan. But what did I do instead? I started writing, and wrote a good few more words than I usually manage to spit out after a full days work. Why is it that in the hustle and bustle of noisy teenagers, screaming children, and other late night coffee drinkers I write more deeply and intelligently than I do when sitting in my peaceful flat with a glass of wine? I am like this everywhere in public. On the bus to work last week I formulated an entire novel in my head following a dream the night before. Is it people? If writers are meant to be such reclusive souls why have I just written about 1000 words of pretty solid prose?
So this brings me to my question for the evening. What really makes a writer? I cannot count the amount of journalism jobs I have applied for. The amount of freelance writing magazines I have submitted to. More often than not (in fact I'm going to go with 99.9% of the times) I have received a very polite yet damning 'thanks but no thanks' letter.  Is this me just getting bigheaded? Surely to be successful with your passion you have to believe in your abilities, in your talent?
Once again I am going round in circles. But I feel I need to know if there is a true definition of a writer. Does it have a job description like all the other soul crushing jobs I have applied for (and had)? And if so, does it fit the cliches? I know in order to be successful I need to read, I need to write, but is there more that I am missing?

I think that might be a good time to round off, so in conclusion I need to meet a highly successful and quite frankly awesome author. Like J.K.Rowling.

Non-deep and pretentious moment - I GET TO GO TO THIS PLACE THIS WEEKEND!!! :D TO SEE 3 AMAZING PEOPLE WHO I CAN'T BE BOTHERED TO FIND A PICTURE OF!!! :D

AND THEN THE WEEK AFTER SEE THIS PERSON!!!!
(Frosty Jack's included)

She's ace :) FACT.

So anywaaaay. Brad should be here soon and I am going to talk him into having wine with me which means yet another late night for moi.
It's so hard being fabulous.

S'laters lovers, stay beautiful.